The foreigners cold as ice Q

The foreigners cold as ice

Q: Theyve got those trucks, right? Theyre making regular trips back and forth to that barricade, they can dump the bodies along the way somewhere. Q: Now where was I? The army guys, yes, they were pretty stupid. And nasty too, ready to engage in gang rape after 4 weeks of no women. Had they never gone that long before? Id hate to see what happens on ships at sea in the Royal Navy. A: Yeah well, you know, its not quite the same here. The constraints of civilization have been lifted by the collapse thereof. Q: Perhaps. But the head army guy stopped the men the first time they tried to rape Celine, and he even gave her back her machete, an odd thing to do with someone you intend to rape later. Q: Of course, all the stupidity and nastiness on the part of the army guys notwithstanding, our Handsome Hero Jim wins the stupidity Grand Prize, hands down, when, in his attempt to rescue the ladies from the clutches of the gang-raping soldiers, he deliberately sets the chained-up zombie loose in the mansion with them in it, thus exposing them to a very grave risk of, not just a hideously gruesome death, but also a fate that is arguably much, much worse than death, never mind rape. A: Yeah, that was a humdinger, wasnt it? Q: Yes indeedy. I dont think anything can top that. Though I think the cherry on top of this frothy, whipped confection was the film-makers little joke, of having the protagonist Jim carry around, as his primary weapon, a baseball bat. Q: In the frame of mind this film put me in, the spectre of poor Jim forced to resort to carrying around the symbol of the American national pastime as his only defense, Im half tempted to go off on a rant about gun control. A: Heh. Guns dont kill zombies, people kill zombies. Q: Yeah, but film would have been a lot different if set in America. In England, guns are so tightly controlled that when something like this hits, the nasty, evil soldiers have plenty of guns and lots and lots of bullets apparently, but ordinary folks are forced to make do with machetes and baseball bats and makeshift the foreigners cold as ice cocktails. Yes, of course, were the foreigners cold as ice going to have a zombie invasion any time soon, but A: Al-righty then, I think were all done here. Thanks for reading folks. Q: Wait a minute, wait a minute! Let me make my point. I was going to say, when people give up their A: Yep, definitely all done. Move along folks, nothing more to see here. It could be Bunnies! Yes, after two years I still just have to do that. Sorry. Ok, yes, Ive never been to England, maybe people do have baseball bats over there. If so, Im sure someone will chime in shortly to correct me and make me look stupid. But it still looked weird to me. Q: You wrote this some months ago, for another MB. Since then, have you remembered any other plot holes that youd like to toss in here? A: Why yes, and thank you for asking. Two things: 1: Our Hero Jim, who works as a bicycle messenger in England with its super-strict gun control laws which, ok ok, I am not going to rant about, suddenly turns into freakin Rambo when he takes on a squad of fully armed and trained soldiers at the barricade, and then further demonstrates his mad, phat, but colossally unlikely skillz by shooting at, and hitting, a metal chain from about thirty feet away. In the dark. In the rain. With one shot. 2: When Our Intrepid Heros are staying at Jims parents house, why do they stay on the ground floor, right near a big honking glass window that can be easily crashed through by, oh, say, a crazed infected zombie guy who feels no pain? Location: Waaaaay over here! Bra-VO! Havent seen the movie, never wanted to see the movie, but this topped the cake for me, as well as making me laugh my ass off. Good job! Now, I must go re-attatch my ass! Try this: Before you post, say what you wrote down out loud. If you find yourself shaking your head and exclaiming something along the lines of, What the hell does that mean?, delete. Dude, chill. Its a zombie movie. Meaning its not actually about zombies but mans inhumanity to man.